What's in a name?

A minor accomplishment in adulthood:
I completed all the steps to officially change my last name!!

When Alex and I got married, I knew I would be changing my last name to his. I had a lot of well-meaning friends and family members give me unsolicited advice about why I should or shouldn't change my last name. But at the end of the day, the choice was mine to make. And I said let's do this.

It's been a crazy long and tedious process. Tons of paperwork. A trip to the social security offices which was surprisingly pleasant! (in and out in 30 minutes - easy peasy.) A trip to the Department of Motor Vehicles which was a not as pleasant... (an online appointment, a ton of paperwork, and 3 hours of my time waiting in 3 different lines). Visits to multiple banks, the HR department at work, JFK airport to update my global entry card, and so many other stops along the way.

At first I was a bit worried that I would feel weird changing my name, but that went away as soon as we were married. Plus, there are so many advantages to my new name:
-Matching first and last names (Toni-with-an-i, Levi-with-an-i).
-Only 4 letters to spell out over the phone to customer service reps...as opposed to a whopping 8!
-I move up in the alphabet! (see ya later M-Z!)
-The prospect of having a child who will have the same last name as both parents (gulp!)...

I'm still practicing my cursive L. I often hesitate when introducing myself to a new person. And I sometimes don't respond when someone calls out my new last name. But I'm slowly getting used to it. And there's something that gives me all the warm and fuzzy feelings when we're called the Levis.

A major accomplishment in adulthood:
I was promoted at the Jewish Museum to Senior Major Gifts Officer.

A new name AND a new title! It's exciting to be rewarded for the hard work I've put in. And I'm honored to be recognized by my boss who I admire very much and by the leadership at the museum. I feel extremely grateful and proud of where I am professionally.

In My Own Little Corner

MY MINDFUL YEAR - JULY



I finally cleaned out my old room on Long Island.

For a while (ahem, 10 years), I've been meaning to go through the memories and tchotchkes and clothes and papers and books in my family's home. The task always seemed a bit too daunting.

When I left home for good and moved out on my own, I boxed things up and stored them in my old room, the basement, and the garage. Then Hurricane Sandy happened and suddenly I had a lot less stuff to go through. So my big plans of sorting and organizing fell to the wayside. However, when my brother started making plans to propose to his girlfriend, I knew it was time. After all, the house on Dover Road will one day soon be his.

This wasn't a complete nostalgia fest since this wasn't the house where I grew up -- my family moved to Oceanside when I was in the twelfth grade. I'd gotten special permission to finish out my senior year of high school in Valley Stream, 3 towns away. After school, I often stopped by my grandma's home in Valley Stream to hang out, do a bit of homework, and eat a snack. My high school boyfriend lived in Carle Place and, since his car was the same Jeep model featured in the original Jurassic Park movie, I usually drove to his neck of the woods for dates. Plus he lived near the mall. Also, minimal time was spent at home during my few free hours since I was 18 years old, working a part time job, and soaking up my last bit of summer before venturing off to college.

When I came home from college during breaks, this was where I hung my hat (and left all my stuff). But those breaks were only ever for a few weeks as I often took classes during winter and summer terms and spent a summer studying abroad. After college, I lived on Long Island and commuted into NYC for a year before moving into my first studio apartment in 2008. And in the ten years since then, I stay overnight on Long Island only a few times a year.

Somehow, despite not really ever truly living there, I amassed a lot of stuff that I stored there. So I dedicated an entire day to clearing, sorting, and discarding. I tossed a lot of stuff. I donated a lot of stuff. I knew I didn't have a ton of space to store more stuff in NYC, so I became pretty ruthless with my editing. I still have a bit more work to do before the room is completely cleared out, but it will be a fairly easy undertaking since everything is in order and contained to one room.

One day, when space is needed for other occupants (a niece or nephew perhaps?), I'll complete the task. And each time I visit, I vow to go through at least one of the neatly arranged assortments of stuff I have waiting for me.

But for now, it feels good to have made some headway on a project I'd long put off.

You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman

MY MINDFUL YEAR - JUNE



Continuing on the theme of trying to be more mindful of the stuff that enters my body, I decided to switch to an all-natural deodorant.

There's a lot of crap in drugstore mass-produced deodorants. Parabens are linked to breast cancer - bad. Aluminum is linked to Alzheimer's Disease - bad. Triclosen, Seareths, TEA and DEA contain carcinogens - bad, bad, and bad. I've been putting these things into my body multiple times a day every single day for years.

It was time for a change.

But this change was...sweat inducing! I've always been a sweaty lady. I don't end a run with a dainty glow. I finish with a red sweaty face and a body to match. When I'm nervous, I sweat. A lot. My favorite season is winter in large part due to the sweaty grossness of summer in NYC. And my sweat does not smell sweet. It smells like sweat.

My old routine looked like this: Each morning I applied deodorant with antiperspirant. Before bed time, I applied clinical strength antiperspirant. My underarms were basically wearing sweat-proof armor.

The cold turkey approach was a little too ambitious for me. So when my clinical strength stick ran out, I just stopped my nightly application of the stuff. Surprisingly, I noticed no difference whatsoever. This was very encouraging!

When it came time to swap out my tried-and-true Donna Karan Cashmere to a natural brand, it took some trial-and-error. And it turned out to be a treacherous journey.

• The Honest Company's lavender spray deodorant smelled like a spa but was 100% ineffective. (And I really did try, one day with 10 applications of the stuff!) 
• Lavanila original stick was not super effective and caused a chemical burn (OUCH!). 
• Native's sensitive skin formula in cotton lily smelled fantastic and worked wonderfully at preventing odor but left me with a gnarly red, bumpy rash (EEK!). 
• Schmidt's for sensitive skin worked and I didn't have any reaction at all. BUT the scent options were less than desirable. I tried 5 in total:
• 1: virgin pina colada (no)
• 2: the scent of the carpeting in a Bikram Yoga class (no, gross)
• 3: that indistinguishable smell of the inside of an old woman's purse (oh hell no)
• 4: lots and lots and lots of lavender (maybe too much lavender for me)
• 5: tea (it actually smells pretty nice with my body chemistry)

My new routine looks like this: Each morning I apply some natural deodorant after my shower. I carry around a travel size deodorant at all times and re-apply if I need it. Before bed time, I wash my underarms with a mild soap.

Now I wear natural deodorant every day and I smell like a fresh cup of jasmine tea. I do sweat but my clothes don't have any yellow pit stains anymore. Most importantly, I'm mindful about this habit. And it feels pretty great to be doing something good for my body.

UPDATE: I now use Schmidt's Rose & Vanilla as I quickly learned the lovely tea scent does not hold up to a sticky, sweaty, NYC subway.