Om Shanti

Last week, I spent 7 days in the Bahamas experiencing life at an ashram. It was peaceful and relaxing - my time was full of reflection. I took a 5 day course on positive thinking and the power of keeping negative thoughts at bay. Aside from learning a great deal about yoga, I learned a great deal about myself. Most importantly - I actually enjoy spending a significant amount of time alone with myself.

The daily schedule was regimented: morning satsang at 6am sharp (meditation, chanting, and a lecture), 8am yoga class, 10am brunch, 12pm positive thinking class, 4pm yoga class, 6pm dinner, 8pm evening satsang (same format as in the morning).

The cuisine was vegetarian, mainly vegan - no tofu, mushrooms, onions, or garlic and very little fat. I ended up fully embraced the meal times as there were only 2 each day. It was also up to the guests to clean up after ourselves. It's amazing how cleaning made me feel so much more at home and invested in my stay. Each day, I would spend a few afternoon hours on the beach, in a hammock, or in the ocean. I made a group of girlfriends from around the world who had each come on their own as well. We easily bonded over our love of yoga.

This vacation was everything I needed and more. I feel like an entirely new person. The horizons in my life are less foggy. I've been back for a week now and the feeling of inner calm and self-love hasn't gone away. I continue to practice yoga daily.

Upon arriving home (after making a quick stop to my parents' home to do my extremely gross laundry), I began to look at my life with a new set of eyes. It's easier to pick out all the negatives than the positives. It takes serious effort to have a sunny outlook. And, as it turns out, being positive leads to a happier, longer life. After taking a deep look at my innermost self and after spending a considerable amount of time inside my own head, I fully appreciate the power of positive thinking. A more positive version of myself is who I will strive to be every single day.

29

As I approach 29 and a 1/2, it seems silly to be writing about my birthday which took place 2 whole seasons ago but that's where this idea all started.

My 29th birthday was the most low-key birthday I've had to date. A small celebration in the office, Passover seder at my aunt's apartment, a quick exchange of presents.

Instead of ringing in another year with booze or food, Alex and I put on our creative hats and took a pottery class at a really cool local shop.
We made beautiful bowls to use in our apartment. And we actually use them everyday! I was so happy to learn that I love pottery and it felt great to do something quiet in a group. Just like yoga - something I've always really loved to do.

The first half of 29, I focused a lot on the needs and wants of others. I barely even took time out of my schedule to celebrate my own birthday! I was just too busy doing other things. I was exhausted trying to please every single person in my world. And so, I've decided to take some time for myself. A 29th birthday present from myself, to myself. A trip to somewhere I've always wanted to go. Not a vacation with my friends full of too much alcohol and too much sun. Not a romantic getaway with my boyfriend to a new place to explore. Not a family focused holiday with all of my near and dear ones. A true present to myself. Just for me.

In a month's time, I'll be studying yoga at the Sivananda Ashram in the Bahamas. I'll be traveling solo with a clear head, a few books on my kindle, and a lot of sunscreen. For years I've been toying around with the idea of one day retiring and studying yoga, practicing more seriously, maybe even teaching. I've practiced yoga for over 15 years now. It brings me to my happy place where I'm my calmest and most in tune with my inner self. It's beautiful. And it's something I don't get to do nearly often enough. After a stressful period in my life, I'm ready for some calm.

Namaste!

2014

2014 is a year full of change. This post is long overdue as I've already been through a bunch since my last post!

Three months ago, I started the year with a new job at Lincoln Center and I really couldn't be happier. I love my new office (the people are nice and warm and friendly). I love my new boss - she is kind and acts like a mentor and always makes me feel valued and appreciated. I love going to work everyday and doing my job because it's fun and rewarding. And I realize that maybe I write with that rose-colored-glasses point of view having only worked there for a few short months. But I never felt this way at Weill and I most definitely didn't feel this way at Roundabout. The last time I loved my job was when I was working at Juilliard and that was about 3 years ago. It feels good to walk into beautiful Lincoln Center and feel like I matter. My career has taken a full circle and I feel like I'm home again.

Last week was another huge change - Alex and I moved into our new apartment! It feels incredible to sit in the kitchen and have a cup of coffee at a real table - I haven't done this in almost a year! The quiet is wonderful. Our new doormen are very sweet. I don't miss having roommates (or a dog that isn't ours making a mess of our home!). The new commute is a dream. It's been quite the adventure moving into the new place and after a week in our new apartment, I already feel like I'm home in our little slice of the big apple.

Most years I make a list of things to accomplish. Sometimes I get creative and give myself a challenge. It's fun to shake things up every now and then. I took my time thinking of the right New Years Resolution (just about 3 months!). And this year, I've decided that my New Years Resolution is very simple and very difficult. I pledge to be kinder to myself. After coming out of a low period, I realize that I'm not always the nicest person to myself. It's not always easy to be kind to yourself with so many comparisons glaring at you in magazines, fashion blogs, and on Facebook. It's hard to tune out all those voices and opinions. At the end of a hard year, it feels good to remember how much I enjoy all the little things that make life worth living.