Recently I received a text from a guy, Mike, who I had apparently met online some time ago. After a quick text exchange, I still had no memory of Mike. He asked me if I would be interested in meeting him for a drink. I didn't respond. Take a hint, Mike! We "met" a year and a half ago through an internet dating service, exchanged a handful of texts, and never went out on an actual date. It's just not going to happen.
So I've been throwing around some questions in my head:
How long is too long of a hiatus from communication before it's too late? Or is it never too late?
Is it our duty as good people to tell someone we're just not interested or should we let the communication fade away into nothingness and assume it's a mutual thing?
When do things stop being polite and start getting creepy?
Surprisingly (or maybe not so surprisingly), this isn't some new phenomenon. (Exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit C). But each time this happens, I always feel that same mix of emotions - embarrassed (for this clueless dude and for me having to reject him more than once) and disappointed (because now I'll have to be very frank with my feelings which can come across as cold, mean, unfeeling, or bitchy).
I don't want to be a jerk who dismisses the feelings of a well-meaning guy. Dating isn't easy. There is no single girl GPS that tells us which path to take to get to the desired destination. I try to be kind but firm, thoughtful but clear.
I definitely don't have the chutzpah to pull off something like that...but maybe that's not such a bad thing!
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