Location Location Location

About 3 years ago, I went out with the cutest architect. He spoke like a surfer and had great hair. We went on a few awesome dates.

On our last date we had dinner in Chelsea at a really awesome restaurant. After we left the restaurant, he asked if I'd be up for getting a drink and I agreed. He chose a nearby watering hole. It had a good crowd for a week night. We ordered our drinks and took seats at the bar. When the clock struck 10, the entire place turned into a gay dance club complete with half naked professional dancers, disco balls that dropped from the ceiling, and loud house music. I starting laughing. He was extremely embarrassed and looked uncomfortable. I admit, it was a bit awkward but nothing too outrageous. He downed his drink and I followed suit. We walked to the subway together and parted ways. I never heard from him again.

But it got me thinking - is the location of the date really that important? Isn't the company your with the most important part of the date? If this surfer architect can't handle a silly gay bar mishap, what other insecurities could be lurking underneath the surface? If he was worth my time, he would have brushed it off and had a nice laugh.

Dating is not all walks on the beach and picnics in the park. But when things go south, the only thing to do is laugh it off.

Bittersweet Symphony

Today is my last day working at The Juilliard School. After four years, tons of crazy phone calls, and lots of laughs, it's all over.

Earlier this week, my coworkers threw me a beautiful send off shindig.

Here I am at my party -

Saying goodbye to coworkers and work study students -

As a gag gift, my boss gave me a gift bag full of boxes of pens. It's a running joke that everyone in my office steals my pens!.....

My real gift was a beautiful fancy pen.

The next day...

My lovely coworkers surprised me with a huge gift. A beautiful red leather professional bag.

This last picture is of the Juilliard Admissions Team who have become my work family. On the far right is my replacement, DJ, who I know will be a fabulous addition to the team.

I'm so excited to begin my new job as Development Associate at Weill Cornell Medical College. And I know I will keep in touch with all of my wonderful coworkers because they're also my friends. I'm blessed to have had such a great experience at Juilliard. My first job out of college was really fantastic. I'm a lucky girl.

Below I have pasted a really lovely blog entry from the Juilliard Admissions Blog written by my coworker Monia:

Today we say goodbye to our much admired Admissions Associate, Toni Rosenbaum, who leaves Juilliard to embark on her next great career adventure. Toni has been the face of Juilliard for literally thousands of applicants (and their parents!) for the past four years and, as happy as we all are for her success, we are also sad for our loss. I wrote a little something for her goodbye party, which I share with you all here.

***
Toni,

Lee* asked us if we’d like to say a few words here today, and I did. But then I had to determine how I’d arrange words that could adequately address what your four years with us have meant to me. And then it hit me – I’ll write a poem! Here’s my first attempt:

Roses are red,
Now I am blue,
We’re losing Toni,
And that really stinks.

You like? No, I didn’t either – too sappy.

Then I pondered what style of poetry would lend itself to a little less sap and realized that a limerick would do the trick! Here’s my second attempt:

Our Toni is pretty terrific
With problems abstract or specific.
She’s charming, she’s sweet,
Wears great shoes on her feet,
And her patience with folks is prolific.

…meh. It’s O.K., but still not quite right.

THEN I remembered that a couple of years ago I challenged my colleagues in Admissions to come up with application related haikus for our blog. I thought maybe the haiku format would work, so here’s that effort:

Just four years ago
You entered our lives, and now
You leave them better.

And with that, I was back to sappy.

So I decided to give up on poetry and simply say – we’ve been so lucky to have you, Toni. Thank you, for everything. And good luck.

Take a Hint

Every now and then a guy from my past just doesn't get the hint.

Recently I received a text from a guy, Mike, who I had apparently met online some time ago. After a quick text exchange, I still had no memory of Mike. He asked me if I would be interested in meeting him for a drink. I didn't respond. Take a hint, Mike! We "met" a year and a half ago through an internet dating service, exchanged a handful of texts, and never went out on an actual date. It's just not going to happen.

So I've been throwing around some questions in my head:

How long is too long of a hiatus from communication before it's too late? Or is it never too late?
Is it our duty as good people to tell someone we're just not interested or should we let the communication fade away into nothingness and assume it's a mutual thing?
When do things stop being polite and start getting creepy?

Surprisingly (or maybe not so surprisingly), this isn't some new phenomenon. (Exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit C). But each time this happens, I always feel that same mix of emotions - embarrassed (for this clueless dude and for me having to reject him more than once) and disappointed (because now I'll have to be very frank with my feelings which can come across as cold, mean, unfeeling, or bitchy).

I don't want to be a jerk who dismisses the feelings of a well-meaning guy. Dating isn't easy. There is no single girl GPS that tells us which path to take to get to the desired destination. I try to be kind but firm, thoughtful but clear.

I definitely don't have the chutzpah to pull off something like that...but maybe that's not such a bad thing!